
Do you have unreasonable expectations of others?
Just so you know: YES, your expectations of other people ARE valid...sometimes. Other people might not like your expectations of them and some relationships may not stand the test when you express what you really want. But would you rather live knowing you stood your ground and respected yourself, or would you like to live a life sensing that your feelings and values do not matter? There’s a...

EXERCISE: Name Your Expectations, Set Better Boundaries
To set boundaries, you need to know what your expectations of others are. Before you dig into what your personal boundaries are, it can be very helpful to know what behaviours you expect from others. What’s interesting about this exercise is that what you expect from folks will be different than what I expect. Our values will inform our expectations, and so will your levels of self-confidence...

Boundaries + Creating Safe Spaces for Others
The other day I was called out for not actively participating in a virtual group activity, and it made me feel like crap.I was going to add this piece to the end of this blog entry, but it bears too much importance to leave to the end: In this article I talk about how I felt unsafe in a Zoom room situation. The situation, in the grand scheme of things, is minor in my life, and I was not subject...

It won’t get better. Set that boundary now.
TW: Homophobia; AIDS mentioned Many years ago I was doing some field work over a few days with a coworker who was an older male. It seemed sensible that we would take one vehicle to the place we were conducting the work, and even though my gut-reaction to sharing a ride with him was palpably ominous, I, being one who didn’t want to cause conflict, agreed to the ride-sharing. Cue Julia Roberts’...